Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Noticing Changes

So, I'm starting week 3 of my transformation.  I have been going to Girl Fight Fitness 2 nights a week.  I have been having my Oola Detox Tea every morning, drinking a gallon of water a day and having an Oola Energy Tea in the afternoon.  I am half way thru my Detox.  I am feeling so much better.  I have less swelling in my ankles.  My hands aren't going tingly as they were before, and I feel less bloated.  I have lost 7 1/2 lbs.  The worst thing about this is that I go to the bathroom all the time.  But I'm ok with that if I'm flushing out all the bad stuff.  I'm thinking of ordering more Oola Detox and Energy Tea and continuing on longer.  I'm so afraid that if I stop and go back to coffee I will gain the weight right back.  I don't want that, I want it to keep coming off.  Today's affirmation from Oola, "I AM mentally ready for physical change."  That's so true.  I am ready.

Friday, February 16, 2018

Making Changes

I'm not sure what it was that finally clicked.  But I have made some long over due changes in my life.  I need to focus on Fitness. That includes, exercise and eating right.

So for fitness, I joined a gym.  It's not the traditional type of gym.  It's called Girl Fight Fitness and it's a kickboxing gym for women.  With the help of a good friend who agreed to join with me I have gone to 3 classes, tonight will be my 4th.  For the first time ever I like exercising.   I am not a small woman.  And I have faced my biggest number and am making a change.  It is very hard for me to say the number but I have said it to 3 people, so I can move forward.  I HATE THE NUMBER.  I have decided that I am going to "punch" the fat out at kickboxing.  I'm not going to lie it's not easy.  But it's not walking on a treadmill, which I totally hate.  Some of the floor exercises are very hard for me and I have to made adjustments.  PUSH-UPS UGH, my arms shake and my knees hurt, but I'm doing them.  At home I have been using an exercise stability ball instead of doing some of the things on the floor, hoping to work up to or down to the floor.  But it's killing my knees.  

Last night I got the ultimate motivation from someone at Girl Fight.  I don't even know her name.  But after we were done she came over to me and told me I was doing awesome and not to give up.  She said she knows how hard it is but to keep doing it. Then she told me that 4 years ago she was 217 pounds heavier.  I hugged her and told her she rocked. It was very emotional for me and I had tears in my eyes.  

For eating right, I'm doing a combination of things. First I stopped eating after 9pm.  That was really hard.  Having oh so good but bad snacks while watching TV is very hard to quit.  I started using the my fitness pal app on my phone, logging everything I eat.  I'm doing an 80/20 plan that gives me a 20% cheat.  That boils down to 4 meals or 1 day of cheating per week.  And this week I added doing a coffee detox with Oola Tea.  Cutting out coffee for 14 days and switching to tea, and drinking a gallon of water every day.  OMG it's a lot of water.  Talk about trips to the bathroom, it seems like right after I go I have to go again.  But it's all good.  I have not had any headaches which I was nervous about getting.  But I have been biting my nails bad, I don't know why.  To help with the cravings I have been putting a drop of grapefruit essential oil by Young Living in my water.  It smells good and tastes good.  Today my new oil came it's called Slique Essence.  It's a blend of Citrus and herbs to help support digestion and weight management.  I'm hoping that it helps with cravings.  You taste the citrus but you smell the mint.  

I'm hoping that I haven't bitten off more than I can chew by trying too many things at once.  We shall see how it goes.

Thursday, February 15, 2018

Time for Change - Time for Me

"Taking care of yourself is not selfish, it's selfless.  A better you is more capable to serve others." Live Oola

This is something that is very hard to me to do.  I take care of everyone and everything else before I take care of me.  It's time for a change.  It's time for me.  Sometimes it takes things going on in other peoples lives to put things into perspective for your own life.  That is happening right now.  Someone I know has just been diagnosed with cancer.  If something like that happened to me have I done all that I was supposed to do with my life...Have I lived my purpose?

All I ever wanted to be was a wife and mother, being an art teacher was my back up plan.  So for 19 years I have focused on my children.  They are needing me less and less now that they are 19, 16 and almost 12.  Knowing that and knowing that I want to be there for their children someday and to travel the country with Ken when they are all out of the house, I need to focus on me now and get in shape.  "To be in  your children's memories tomorrow, you need to be in their lives today." Live Oola

I know that what has held me back is being so busy doing things for everyone else that I don't have time for me, and then at the end of the day I'm so tired that I don't want to do anything.  But most of all it's fear.  Fear of being judged by others and fear of failing. About 5 years ago I was exercising with a personal trainer.  I don't like exercising in front of other people, or in front of mirrors.  I feel like I am being judged and I HATE going on the treadmill.  But when I was working out with the personal trainer I felt comfortable.  Until one day he forgot and scheduled an open circuit at my time slot.  That day I had my first anxiety attack.  It was awful.  My heart felt like it was beating out of my chest, I was sweating, crying and couldn't catch my breath.  The way I felt in that moment stopped me from exercising, until now.  For the past year I have been wanting to try something new, a kickboxing class for women, but fear and financial reasons stopped me from joining.  Well last week I did it.  I went to my first class.  OMG it was hard.  It wasn't a kickboxing class, it was a kettle bell class.  I am so grateful to my good friend for coming with me and being my security blanket.  I am looking forward to going trying kickboxing.  I have now gone to 3 classes and have exercised at home twice. 

The other thing that has given me the motivation I need is Oola.  I have been reading "Oola: Find Balance in an Unbalanced World," and following OolaLife on Facebook.  Watching their Facebook live's and getting motivation and direction.  I love the quotes they post on FB and on Pinterest.  Year after year things stay the same and I have become content with that, that's not good.  There is one thing that kept changing and that's a number.  I don't want to say the number out loud or even type it because I don't like it.  But I have come to a point that I have to change it.  I don't want to be afraid any more.  I don't want to stand on the sidelines watching, I want to participate.  This change is not going to be easy, no thing worth it is.  I am finally ready to start.

"Don't fear failure. Fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today." Live Oola

"Stop being afraid of what could go wrong, and start being excited about what could go right." Live Oola


Wednesday, February 14, 2018

My Break Is Over

I had been struggling with somethings personally for about a month.  My break is over and I'm back ready to write.

I was asked "What am I trying to say with my blog?"  Think about what "artsyBE" is and model my blog for it.  From the day I started artsyBE  I have always said it was for me.  It's about my journey to being a better me, it's about my struggles and my accomplishments.  If my writing inspires someone else along the way that's amazing.  Everyone should find their own BE List and revisit it every once in a while or yearly whatever works.  A lot of the things on my BE List have remained the same and some things have changed, because life is ever changing, but the center of it all has remained the same. My BE List is who I want to BE to make me better in life.

My BE List not my Bucket List